"You know...never mind. I know you're busy. I can talk to you later."
"Hey, it's not a problem. I got him a snack and I've locked myself in the bathroom. What's up?"
"I was, uh, just calling to see how your day was going."
"Liar. It's the middle of the day and that means you had to sneak out to make this call and you wouldn't do that just to say 'hi'. Now out with it. Before the little rugrat finds me."
"It's just that...I hate my job."
"Mm-hmm..."
"I am feeling more and more desperate for a change. I've exhausted every opportunity for advancement here and I feel like God wants me to move on, but...It's like I'm in the midst of some dance and I don't know the steps. A crazy combination of the limbo and the fox-trot."
"I'm sorry. This is such a rotten situation."
"I spend all day wondering -- Do I quit? Do I go back to school? Do I stick it out? My head is spinning."
"Hmmm...Do you remember that class we took with Madame Croix?"
"The dance class? Uhm, yeah. Isn't that where you tore your ACL?"
"Yes, but I also met Tom in that class, so it's had its redeeming qualities. Anyway, I remember her going on and on about how ballet dancers, when they are pirouetting, have a focal point so they don't lose balance."
"Didn't she call it spotting?"
"Right. Perhaps you need to do some spotting. Get your focus back on Jesus and let Him work out all this dizzying future stuff. Maybe write down Hebrews 12:2 and stick it somewhere you can see it often. Uh-oh. He found me."
"Tommy?"
"Yep. And he really enjoyed his graham cracker. Ugh."
"Thanks for hearing me out. I'll let you go. Call me later?"
"Thursday night. Same time?"
"Yep. Love you."
"Love you back. Come here, little boy."
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| image courtesy of dalbera (via Flickr Creative Commons) |
Linking up with Trifecta: 33-333 words inspired by the single word exhaust (to consider or discuss (a subject) thoroughly or completely or to try out the whole number of <exhausted all the possibilities>.)
Linking up with Write at the Merge this week - inspired by the picture above.
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ReplyDeleteI have been known to hide in the garage ... just for a few moments to quiet! I think both women are spinning in their own ways and will both have to find their own focal points. Thanks for stopping by.
DeleteExcellent way to use both prompts!
ReplyDeleteThank you ... this was one story that bumped around in my head until I finally got it all "on paper." I like when the characters line up and wait for their stories to be told. :)
ReplyDeletewow, great piece of dialogue! you have a good ear.
ReplyDeleteThank you ... I don't know if I should admit to hearing voices :), but these came through clearly.
DeleteSpotting. Yes. That's what we all need. Keep your eye on the prize. Also, the kid with the cracker.
ReplyDeleteThank you - it's easy to get whipped around and dizzy in life. It's always good to have your focal point!
DeleteSeconded, a wonderful piece of pure conversation. Perfect and simple. Well done!
ReplyDeleteThank you - I appreciate your warm words and encouragement!
DeleteThank you - perhaps I've had a few conversations like this from my own bathroom!
ReplyDeleteLike the idea of spotting. Good dialog.
ReplyDeleteThank you ... I think life can throw us all off balance. It's good to have something to focus on.
DeleteWe could all use some spotting in life, I'm guessing! Nice job with giving us the context through dialog; I had no trouble figuring out the relationship here.
ReplyDeleteGood ... I had their voices in my head and I hoped to tell the story well. But 333 words is a doozy! They were a bit more yakkity in my mind! Thanks for visiting and commenting.
DeleteI love how it's just dialogue. But even being just dialogue, I know exactly what the characters are doing, I can picture it without any blocking or tags :) Nicely done
ReplyDeleteSometimes dialogue scares me so I thought I'd face my fears head on! I'm glad that they spoke on paper the way they did in my head. Thanks for stopping by and commenting!
ReplyDeleteGlad I'm not the only one who has used the bathroom hiding trick!
ReplyDeleteHa! I've also found the garage and the laundry room to be good hiding places.
DeleteI think you nailed the dialogue--no need to be scared of it any more!
ReplyDeleteThank you - very generous and encouraging words!
DeleteI agree with TMW Hickman about the dialogue. It moved smoothly and definitely gave me a sense of your characters. I also liked the mom hiding in the bathroom:~)
ReplyDeleteThis was a good read and I liked your take on the prompts.